Misogynistic Men: What It Is, 48 Signs & Psychology of a Sexist Women Hater

When you encounter a misogynist, he will leave you furious and with a bitter taste in your mouth. Misogynistic men are a species of their own, for sure.

Misogyny is a loaded word. Though by definition, it means, “the dislike or prejudice against women,” there’s a lot more to it. Does a misogynist wear an, “I hate women” t-shirt? Not at all.

Actually, most of the time, misogynistic men are not fully conscious of the fact that they dislike women. So, before they figure it out, save yourself the energy and notice the signs ahead of time. [Read: Clear signs you’re in a narcissistic relationship]

What’s a misogynist?

A misogynist is someone who dislikes women. But, it is not as simple as that. You might think, why would a misogynist date a woman?

Well, it isn’t just about disliking women, it’s about being disrespectful and prejudiced toward women. And the hard part is that it is not always so clear from the start. Misogynists are not always blatant. Often the signs of a misogynist are pretty subtle.

These men may appear to care for their mom and their sister with gallant protection. But in reality, they are manipulative and will do anything to overpower a woman. [Read: Toxic people – 48 warning signs and the best ways to deal with them]

Misogynists, deep down, are afraid of women, especially powerful women. They will do whatever it takes to control you and put you down. Essentially, whether they are aware of their misogynist tendencies or not, this type of man enjoys making women feel weak. 

Ever heard of mansplaining? That’s just one thing misogynistic men will do to try and rob you of your power and make you feel less than yourself. 

Not one woman in the world deserves a man like this in her life. [Read: 18 ways to spot a woman hater]

Can women be misogynists?

For sure, yes they can. The term “misogynist” isn’t just reserved for men, it simply means someone who hates women. So, a woman can hate other women and that makes her a misogynist.

But, just as male misogyny might not be that clear, female misogyny is the same. It might be that a woman has a certain idea of what other women should look like in order to be accepted. This is usually skinny, pretty, youthful, ladylike, etc. [Read: Internalized misogyny and women – How to recognize it, fight it and overcome it]

Another type of female misogynist could be a woman who sees a certain type of behavior as “wrong” and they do everything they can to bring those women back into line.

As you can see, it’s not that a woman will out right hate other women, but they will judge certain types of behavior and make it very clear how they feel about it. [Read: Toxic love – ways it can harm you permanently and how to get away]

Male chauvinist & sexist vs. misogynist

Chauvinist and sexist might seem the same as misogynistic, but there are subtle differences.

We know that misogynistic men hate and distrust women. But a male chauvinist believes that men are superior to women. They believe women are less smart than men and capable of less.

So, what about sexist? Sexism is discrimination based on gender. A good example of that could be unequal pay between men and women.

These terms are all rooted in the same general base idea, but they tend to shoot off in different directions from that point. However, they do have one similarity – they’re all wrong! [Read: How to recognize and end toxic relationships]

The common signs of misogynistic men

Date a woman-lover, not a woman-hater. But, of course, that can sometimes be easier said than done. It’s time for you to take charge and put the pieces of the puzzle together – how can you spot misogynistic men?

1. He doesn’t value your feelings

He doesn’t really notice your emotional state unless it’s arousal. Basically, a misogynist is only concerned about themselves and not being overpowered by the opposite gender.

Whether you’re happy or not isn’t his problem. [Read: How to talk about your feelings in a relationship and grow closer]

2. He comments on others’ looks

“She’s too fat for those jeans,” or “She wears too much makeup.” Because, in his mind, she’s wearing her jeans for him, not for herself.

A misogynist will comment on other women’s looks, and the majority will be negative comments. It’s all about undermining and insulting women, so if he’s talking like this, it’ll only get worse. [Read: Signs you’re dating a self-obsessed narcissist]

3. He uses your emotional state against you

“Are you having your period? Is that why you’re angry?” No, you’re angry because he’s a moron. If you show some emotion other than admiration, it’s clearly because you’re on your period. There’s no other reason you would be angry.

4. He feels like he’s entitled to everything

A misogynist feels like he’s entitled to it all. If he sees a woman he likes, he’s going to have her. Why? Because he thinks he deserves her.

5. He doesn’t let you speak

If you’re just about to voice your opinion or thoughts on a topic and he cuts you off, he obviously doesn’t value you. He has something smarter and better to say, or so he thinks.

If you’re getting cut off every two minutes, this guy doesn’t actually want to hear you speak. He wants you to sit, shut up, and listen to him. [Read: Signs of a narcissist and ways to break up with them]

6. It’s always your fault

Even if he clearly made a mistake, it’ll be because you did something that distracted him or made him think something else. It’ll always be like that.

Why? Because he doesn’t make mistakes, he’s a man – and a misogynist. And you’re a woman who doesn’t know any better, so mistakes are expected.

7. He loves to give you advice

You might have asked your male friends so many times for their opinions about what you’re wearing or your hairstyle – it’s a normal thing that people do. However, misogynist men will give you advice that you didn’t ask for.

If you ask for advice, that’s different. But if he’s giving you a list of things to change about yourself and you just got out of the shower, he has a problem. [Read: How to deal with negative people and stop them from sapping your energy]

8. “Back in the day”

You might catch him talking about how he doesn’t think there’s a pay gap between men and women. Or that he prefers the old times when a man would provide for and protect the family. Now, you know, women are working, making their own money, and don’t necessarily need to rely on a man.

Well, that’s a problem for him. Why? Because now you have a say. And, oh yeah, he’s a misogynist. [Read: Types of toxic relationships to watch out for]

9. He knows it all

Who’s the 49th President of the U.S.A? Wait, he knows it. He knows it all. The guy is apparently a walking encyclopedia.

Now, if he’s wrong and you correct him, he won’t believe you. In fact, he’ll probably Google it right in front of you. And wait for his reaction when he sees he’s wrong – he won’t tell you that you’re right.

10. He “knows” what a real woman is

A misogynist is fully aware of what a real woman should look like. Her shoulder to hip ratio, the size of her breasts – he has a Ph.D. in it all.

These guys are all about attaining the perfect woman – she’s physically a Barbie doll, she doesn’t speak, and she puts out. [Read: Self-concept – how we create and develop it to control our happiness]

11. He sexualizes women by race

Perhaps you’ve heard him talk about other women that he’s been with. If he’s talking about being with a Latina because she’s “spicy in bed,” or an African woman because she’s a “lioness in the sack,” well, you cannot sexually stereotype a race more than that.

Get rid of this guy. [Read: How to handle controlling behavior in a relationship]

12. His fetish is non-consensual pain

Now, if you’re into BDSM, that’s one thing. However, a misogynist tends to fantasize about non-consensual pain. They want you to hurt when you don’t want to.

This can be physical, emotional, mental, or verbal abuse. You won’t see it right away, but be very aware of how he acts after you’ve told him you don’t like something he does.

Does he do it again? Yep. We bet he does. [Read: Am I in an abusive relationship?]

13. Voicing your opinion is disrespectful

If you’re angry and yell or complain, you’re showing him disrespect. It’s not lady-like, and it is also very disrespectful to the man. Yeah, that’s crap.

If he doesn’t like the way you voice your opinion *if you’re being abusive that’s different*, then he’ll tell you that he thinks you’re being disrespectful. You’re not obeying that misogynist man.

14. Sexual confidence means you’re a slut

If there’s a woman who’s sexually confident, he’ll probably say that she’s a slut. You’ll probably hear this early on in the relationship, so if you do, run.

A misogynist does not want women to be in control of his sexual energy. It’s a powerful thing and he’s losing control. [Read: 15 subtle signs of a controlling boyfriend]

15. You cannot make your own choices about your body

If he’s telling you that you should have a boob job and that he’ll pay for it, then he could be a misogynist. He doesn’t own your body, even though he thinks he does.

If you’re dating a man who is trying to change your body, then we would advise you to pack your bags.

16. He’s unfaithful

Of course, in the beginning, you won’t notice. He’s too charming and gentlemanly. However, as time passes, you’ll see that he’s unfaithful.

Why should he be faithful to you? You’re just a woman. Half the world is full of women, so why not taste the other flavors. [Read: What is cheating in a relationship?]

Misogynistic men are well-known for being cheaters.

17. He’ll ghost you and then suddenly re-appear

You’re basically one of many and he doesn’t care about your feelings. He’ll grab your attention with charming chat and then disappear. When he can be bothered to get in touch again, he will.

The best thing you can do is not be available when he does. [Read: Ways guys manipulate and control their girlfriend]

18. He’s charming at first

This is the hardest part about identifying a misogynist. They’re charming, and they can easily try to manipulate and control you.

Let’s be honest, all guys are charming in the beginning. So, initially, you may not be able to tell. However, if you keep the other points in mind, you’ll be able to see it.

19. He talks over women

Everyone is guilty of interrupting once in a while, but if he only does this when women are talking, he shows clear signs of being a misogynist. 

If he talks over women repeatedly and feels what he has to say is more important than anything you may have to say, he disrespects you and all other women. He may even hear a woman’s idea and reject it only to then claim it as his own. [Read: How to deal with a disrespectful boyfriend in the best way possible]

20. He deems you not smart enough to talk

Men who despise women will cut them off when they are speaking and ignore their completely valid opinions. If you are concerned about something he will say that you’re being crazy or emotional.

He may even claim he knows better or that you aren’t smart enough to participate in a specific discussion.

21. With every compliment is a criticism

Men who are misogynists know how to hide it at first. They may throw out the compliments, but they will always be physical. Men who see women as a lower class will tell a woman she is beautiful or hot, but never compliment her mind. 

He may even add an insult to every compliment. Saying something like “you’re beautiful for a librarian.” Or “you shouldn’t waste your looks working in an office.” [Read: Types of men you shouldn’t date if you want a good guy]

He thinks he is complimenting you but is really solely defining you by your looks.

22. He won’t take no for an answer

Misogynistic men seem to think women exist only to please them. If a man buys you a drink and you have no interest in talking to him or going home with him, he will make a fuss. He will say he bought you a drink, and now you owe him.

If he asks to dance or for a date and you say no, he will demand a reason why. And he will not accept your answer unless you say you have a boyfriend, because he can only respect another man, not a woman. [Read: Accepting drinks from strangers – the things you need to know]

23. He respects the opinions of men

As misogynists hate and disrespect women, they will often care about their respect for other men. They will look up to men, listen to men, and confide in men.

He will never go to a woman for advice or her opinion. He’s part of that guys-only club that he thinks is the most important thing in the world. [Read: 15 signs of a lack of respect in a relationship that you can’t ignore]

24. He is controlling

A misogynist won’t care what you want. In the same way, he won’t take you seriously. He will control you. If you’re going to go out with the girls, he will insist you spend time with him. He may even insist you stay home alone if he wants to go out because he wants to have power over you. 

A misogynist will take any opportunity he can to demonstrate his power and influence over you. [Read: 15 subtle signs of a controlling boyfriend most girls don’t notice]

25. He is competitive

When a man disrespects women, he cannot deal with being lesser than them in any way. Whether you beat him at pool, at a video game, or have a better driving record, he won’t be able to deal with it.

He will constantly make excuses that he was tired, something went wrong, or that you cheated. He cannot accept that a woman could possibly be better than him at anything.

26. He treats women like property

Misogynistic men act as if women are possessions that they own. It can be sweet to hear a guy you like call you “my girl.” But in this case, he actually treats you like his property, rather than his equal.

He cannot comprehend that women have their own wants and needs that go beyond him. To him, you’re nothing more than a pretty little thing to hang off his arm. [Read: Traits of toxic people that can hurt and emotionally damage you]

27. He’s ultra-selfish

Misogynistic men are selfish lovers. He is only concerned with his own pleasure and not yours. Be careful because he may even try to exhibit his physical strength over you. He will also most likely pass over foreplay altogether.

A misogynist uses a woman’s body for his own pleasure and has zero concern for hers. [Read: Can you get a selfish lover to be more giving?]

28. He is rude to service workers and the elderly

Misogynists feel they have a higher status than others. They look at themselves as better than women. And it is not just women, but also elderly women, service workers, etc. 

Whether someone is in a lower economic class, has a less glamorous job, or is less attractive, he will treat them as unworthy of respect. If a woman cannot provide him with sex, he feels he has no use for her. [Read: 15 signs he just wants sex and is only using you for his enjoyment]

29. He talks about women as if they are objects

He will describe women as objects, exploit women, use them for his benefit, and treat them as if they are not human beings with feelings. And if he does, he wants to hurt their feelings. 

A misogynist may, in some cases, even brag to his friends about having overpowered a woman, assaulted a woman, or worse. 

30. He is overprotective

This is where many women confuse love for misogyny. A man who wants to have power over you may seem jealous and protective, but in reality, he wants to dominate you. 

He may appear jealous of a male friend or even a male coworker. But rather than being angry with him, he will show his rage to you. He wants you to fear him and obey him. [Read: 18 signs that reveal a dominating and overprotective boyfriend]

31. He hates your independence

He wants you to depend on him for everything. That way, you can never leave. He may insist you quit your job because he can pay for you, but then he will control every aspect of your life and use it against you.

Anything that you do alone or without him is unacceptable. If a man doesn’t celebrate your success and independence, he is likely a misogynist. [Read: How to be independent even if you’re in a relationship]

32. He is homophobic

Many misogynists are disgusted by the idea of two men sharing a life together. Seeing this or even hearing about it may make them angry or violent. It is likely due to his own insecurities, but there is no excuse. 

There is no opinion in this situation. You can disagree that pineapple belongs on pizza, but homosexuality is not something you can argue about. It is a way of life and a way to love.

If a man you know is disgusted by that or violent towards it, he does not deserve to have you in his life. [Read: 20 intellectual conversations that ignite meaningful communication]

33. He emotionally abuses you

A misogynist knows how to make you feel utter crap about yourself. If you threaten to leave him, he will tell you that you cannot do any better, and you will always be alone. He will blame you for any problem you have as a couple and is a master manipulator. 

If you are with a guy that makes you feel bad about yourself, get out of that relationship immediately. It is unhealthy for your mental and emotional health. [Read: The signs that help you spot an emotional abuser]

34. Some misogynists are violent

If a man is violent towards you, whether physically or sexually, call the police or talk to a trusted friend or family member. Create a plan to get away from him. If you feel your life is in danger, reach out to an abuse hotline immediately. 

Any man that would physically hurt you is more than a misogynist but also a criminal. No matter what he says, if he apologizes, tells you it’s your fault or threatens you, do whatever you can to escape. This is a dangerous situation no one deserves to be in.

35. He’s a master of mansplaining

When a guy mansplains something to a woman, he speaks to her as though she is a child or she has no brain of her own. He may use simple language, speak loudly as if she cannot hear, and basically talk down to her.

Mansplaining is often done in front of other people to add further impact. The misogynist is trying to show those around him that this “little woman” doesn’t understand and needs to have everything explained to her in child-like terms. [Read: Mansplaining – 25 ways to spot a dick when you’re talking to one]

36. He has bad relationships with significant women in his life

It could be his mother, sister, or grandmother, but the significant women in his life don’t benefit from better relationships with him either.

Let’s be truthful here, most men would do anything for their moms. The misogynist somehow believes it’s the other way around.

37. He catcalls women

If you hear or see a guy catcalling a woman on the street, either whistling or making a remark, it’s a major sign of misogyny. He thinks she’s an object for him to comment upon.

It doesn’t occur to him that she has feelings. [Read: How to let go of a relationship – 17 things to do to walk away unhurt]

38. He has strong ideas about gender roles

Misogynistic men believe that guys should always be several rungs up the ladder than women. If he has strong ideas about so-called gender roles, that’s a red flag.

He will probably disagree with equal pay, tell you that guys shouldn’t spend any time in the kitchen, and that cleaning is all for women.

39. He views women as the enemy

Misogynistic men think that all women are out to sabotage them. They assume that women simply lie all the time and act coy to get what they want. They never assume that perhaps women are just sticking up for themselves, as they have every right to do.

These types of men speak about women as if they are not only second-class citizens, but people who are out to get them. [Read: 15 gender stereotypes about males we need to let go of for good]

40. He participates in locker room talk

We’ve all seen movies with this type of chat. Groups of men sit together talking about humor that’s totally male-dominated. They might make comments about women that are dirty or vulgar and be totally sexist in general.

If you know a guy that does this, don’t spend another second of your time with him.

41. He has “Madonna Whore” complex

Misogynistic men suffer from Madonna Whore complex in a big way. To them, women have to be pure and virginal to be attractive.

They assume that women are either saintly and innocent or they’re dirty and degraded. There’s no in-between. [Read: How to treat people better and live a much happier life in return]

What causes misogynistic behavior?

But, how does a misogynist become this way? Is it just decided at birth? Is it society or their parents? 

Well, for centuries, the world has conformed to these separate ideals of femininity and masculinity. But, as most people living in modern times, we know that there is a level to which this way of thinking and living is toxic. 

According to specialists, society shouldn’t take all the blame. You often see the signs of a misogynist in men who had traumatic childhoods, especially poor relationships with their mothers. [Read: 19 inspiring male feminist ideas from men around the world]

Naturally, all children will undergo hardships, but young men who experience neglect or abuse are more likely to show signs of hyper-masculinity. This means he will be quick to rage, competitive, and even misogynist to promote the idea that he doesn’t need to depend on a woman.

None of this means that men become misogynists because of their mothers. We are all influenced by our parents, but we don’t all become angry or misled. Misogynists refuse to accept responsibility for their actions and are reluctant to admit what they are.

Like most poor behavior from men, the root cause is shame, so misogyny is the defense mechanism. Sure, it’s sad, but not sad enough to feel sorry for them. [Read: Signs of internalized misogyny]

There are a few other common issues that can lead to misogyny:

1. Religious constructs

2. Personal values

3. The opinions of friends around them

4. The media

So, as you can see, we can assume that misogynistic men aren’t born, but developed. [Read: Insightful lessons to help you have a better life]

How to deal with a misogynist

If you’ve found yourself in the midst of a misogynist, we have sympathy for you. But now you know the signs of this type of man, you know what you’re dealing with.

There are three main points to remember when dealing with a misogynist.

1. Remember that his views are his problem

Misogynistic men are very good at manipulating and in some cases, a woman can start to believe what she is being told over and over again. This is a form of gaslighting and it’s nothing short of emotional abuse.

Remember that his views aren’t your problem and they’re certainly not connected with reality. [Read: What causes narcissism?]

2. Stand your ground

Do not allow him to back you into a corner and make you agree with what he is saying. Yes, you standing up for yourself will probably enrage him, but why should you bow down to him?

We know he’s wrong, you know he’s wrong. The only one here that doesn’t know this, is him.

Continue to be independent. Carry on seeing your friends, wearing what you want, and doing the things you enjoy. Don’t let him stop you. [Read: How to stand up for yourself]

3. Know when to leave

In the end, you’re going to either have to put up with his behavior or you will need to walk away. Under no circumstances do we recommend you putting up with it. You don’t deserve it.

So, you have to know when to leave. Be brave, seek out the support of your friends and family. Make a plan and go.

Don’t look back. [Read: Why you should run if you see these relationship red flags]

Are narcissistic and misogyny the same thing?

If you know anything about narcissism, you’ll probably be reading this and wondering whether misogynists are indeed narcissistic. They certainly exhibit some of the same behaviors and they’re extremely manipulative when they want something.

However, for a person to be labeled a true narcissist, they have to be diagnosed with NPD, or Narcissistic Personality Disorder. The troubling thing is that there are many people wandering around with NPD and they don’t feel like anything is wrong with them.

However, there are definite overlaps and if you’re in a relationship with a guy who is very misogynistic, you might want to start reading up on the signs of narcissism too. The chances of him showing more than a few are probably pretty high. [Read: What types of narcissism should you be on the lookout for?]

Can a misogynist change?

Yes, but it’s unlikely.

Anyone can change if they want to, but the chances of a misogynistic man waking up one day and realizing that all of his thoughts and ideas are wrong, are pretty slim.

However, a man may go through a traumatic experience that makes him open his eyes and see things differently. In that case, he will need support to change his ideas and perhaps even require therapy along the way. [Read: How to change your life – easy steps for a dramatic life makeover]

Yet, if a misogynistic man doesn’t want to change, he won’t and can’t.

All that’s left for you to do is leave him with his outdated and toxic thoughts, and go find someone who values you for the wonderful human being you are.

[Read: 22 early warning signs of a really bad boyfriend]

You probably thought dating was going to be easy. But, you have to keep your eyes open, look for the signs of a misogynist, and go with your gut instinct.